Saturday, January 03, 2009
Reflections From "Tuesdays With Morrie" by Mitch Abrom
"Take any emotion - love for a woman, or grief for a loved one, or what I'm going through, fear and pain from a deadly illness. If you hold back on the emotions - if you don't allow yourself to go all the way through them - you can never get to being detached, you're too busy being afraid. You're afraid of the pain, you're afraid of the grief. You're afraid of the vulnerability that loving entails.
"But by throwing yourself into these emotions, by allowing yourself to dive in, all the way, over your head even, you experience them fully and completely. You know what pain is. You know what love is. You know what grief is. And only then can you say, 'All right. I have experienced that emotion. I recognize that emotion. Now I need to detach from that emotion for a moment'."
I believe in this. I believe in this wholly and completely. I believed in these words before I read them. When I read them they were familiar, like the words had appeared for my benefit, and to prove to me that I am correct. At least in this. At least in this belief. To push away time, and people, and judgements, and emotions. To absorb what is happening and throw myself into it, into the person, into the moment, into the place, into whatever I so choose to be absorbed by.
I believe that this is why no matter what happens I have the power to forgive. To love someone's faults as well as their virtues. To dare to do things that may be embarrassing, or shameful, or risky. To embrace the things that others may find frightening and also to enjoy the emotions that wash over me when I am sad. Not to hesitate when others laugh. Not to turn and run when I'm told 'no'. Not to become bitter or resentful when I am hurt by friends, but try to understand. And, if you know me, you know I am loving, but not naive. I am sweet, but innocent. I am friendly, but no fool. If you were forgiven by me, Thank You. If you were loved by me, Thank You. You gave me the opportunity to make myself better and I am eternally grateful.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Away
I found you...
half your face is buried in a pillow and your sweet eyes look back. you find me beautiful, but the beautiful one is you.
And why can I not breathe sometimes, the world closes in on me, and why can I not see sometimes, it's just never enough.
I wake to find you sitting on the edge of the bed crying softly. extending arms to enfold you, my heart melts and I Fight to take it all away. i Pray i can take it all away. maybe all my schooling and education and all my psychobabble can take it all away.
the palm of my hands find the shape of your face and I'm angry someone somewhere didn't pay
Away
I found you...
half your face is buried in a pillow and your sweet eyes look back. you find me beautiful, but the beautiful one is you.
And why can I not breathe sometimes, the world closes in on me, and why can I not see sometimes, it's just never enough.
I wake to find you sitting on the edge of the bed crying softly. extending arms to enfold you, my heart melts and I Fight to take it all away. i Pray i can take it all away. maybe all my schooling and education and all my psychobabble can take it all away.
the palm of my hands find the shape of your face and I'm angry someone somewhere didn't pay
Friday, January 09, 2009
Friday, January 09, 2009
The Crab
I pull you, very slowly from the inside. Sticky sweet. And tug the strings. Heartaching. Where are you? Have I swallowed you up. Absorbed completely. Or are you waiting, until it's safe again. When I'm calm and warm. Like the sea down South. In Spring.
The Crab
I pull you, very slowly from the inside. Sticky sweet. And tug the strings. Heartaching. Where are you? Have I swallowed you up. Absorbed completely. Or are you waiting, until it's safe again. When I'm calm and warm. Like the sea down South. In Spring.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
waiting
waiting, wrenched by your silhouette
torn down limb by limb, pride and ego
vanity crumbles and laying bare
a carmel hand scratches the surface skin of a white world.
a tugging of accents at my ear
screeching to a halt,
flowing in harmony with another
that would like to understand me.
against tides too big I throw my body
and throw deceptive glances
that catch in the diamonds that hold the sun captive in water.
there is hope there, and promise.
it needs time to come to fruition, so I float,
and decide to wait.
waiting
waiting, wrenched by your silhouette
torn down limb by limb, pride and ego
vanity crumbles and laying bare
a carmel hand scratches the surface skin of a white world.
a tugging of accents at my ear
screeching to a halt,
flowing in harmony with another
that would like to understand me.
against tides too big I throw my body
and throw deceptive glances
that catch in the diamonds that hold the sun captive in water.
there is hope there, and promise.
it needs time to come to fruition, so I float,
and decide to wait.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Miami
mango, hibiscus, sand, and coral
white linen suits in Little Havana
roaches bigger than hands and feet, faster than mouths, hungrier than dirty faces begging in the streets.
avocado, pulled pork, chicharrones, arroz y frijoles
dame de comer
when I think of home...my mom doesn't much come to mind.
tangled sheets
cold air conditioning from the humming wall unit in East Hialeah.
no Bailey's Cafe for spics
heat waves; mirages of success and beauty and
friendships
a memory for every square inch of the big city
El Gato Tuerto me hizo reir because that was the first place
I bought beer legally and they never asked for
I.D.
Chango y Oshun come hold everyone but me.
street vendors pushing mamoncillos y limones y perico
dime lo que quieres and its there.
Miami
mango, hibiscus, sand, and coral
white linen suits in Little Havana
roaches bigger than hands and feet, faster than mouths, hungrier than dirty faces begging in the streets.
avocado, pulled pork, chicharrones, arroz y frijoles
dame de comer
when I think of home...my mom doesn't much come to mind.
tangled sheets
cold air conditioning from the humming wall unit in East Hialeah.
no Bailey's Cafe for spics
heat waves; mirages of success and beauty and
friendships
a memory for every square inch of the big city
El Gato Tuerto me hizo reir because that was the first place
I bought beer legally and they never asked for
I.D.
Chango y Oshun come hold everyone but me.
street vendors pushing mamoncillos y limones y perico
dime lo que quieres and its there.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Friday, March 20, 2009
the call
her belly is rouning out now, two months left
she looks up at me
tries to conjure up sweet smiles and mews
knowingly, attempts to persuade
the vet hasn't called back
when she does I'll take her in and get her taken care of
kittens and all
in the trash
something reminds me, something intimate
waving it away,
a memory like a fly
what would I do with them?
no, its better this way. the vet said.
so I wait for the call
to take her in
to empty her out.
the call
her belly is rouning out now, two months left
she looks up at me
tries to conjure up sweet smiles and mews
knowingly, attempts to persuade
the vet hasn't called back
when she does I'll take her in and get her taken care of
kittens and all
in the trash
something reminds me, something intimate
waving it away,
a memory like a fly
what would I do with them?
no, its better this way. the vet said.
so I wait for the call
to take her in
to empty her out.
Tuesday July 07, 2009
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
Apology to Her
Waking up beside her was what everyone wants.
Sweet, slow, love in between warm sheets
counting myself lucky for the even flowing rhythm
the easy going conversation
laidback, down-to-earth, let's lay in bed all day
kind of comfortable love.
Exactly one year later I woke to find my
thighs were lonely, my passions cold.
My voice was lost; now whispers in her ear.
Travelling her skin made me forget the world
kept me settled and submissive
my fierce hunger contented only with milk.
Apology to Her
Waking up beside her was what everyone wants.
Sweet, slow, love in between warm sheets
counting myself lucky for the even flowing rhythm
the easy going conversation
laidback, down-to-earth, let's lay in bed all day
kind of comfortable love.
Exactly one year later I woke to find my
thighs were lonely, my passions cold.
My voice was lost; now whispers in her ear.
Travelling her skin made me forget the world
kept me settled and submissive
my fierce hunger contented only with milk.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
